I have been off birth control for over a year but got back on for a couple months prior and through our wedding. I wanted to make sure that there were no surprises on our wedding day or while we were honeymoon-ing in Cancun, Mexico. Now that the honeymoon is over and Troy has conquered the unemployment monster we are starting to consider having babies.
I have mixed emotions on what should come next in my life. My 3 top priorities are buying a house, having a baby and getting some kind of degree.
As for my degree, I keep going back and forth on what I want to do with my life. I have taken quite a few college classes and if I wanted to I could probably be done with my AA and could begin working on my paralegal certificate but is that what I really want to do? I have been working on classes to transfer to a university. I have always wanted to get a degree in Consumer and Family Science but now I am not so sure. The dream is still there but my motivation to keep going and keep dishing out the money and time to continue classes is wearing on me. I am half tempted to just throw up my hands and start my paralegal classes. That way I can use the experience and time I have already invested into my current job and use it to my advantage. I feel like I am getting paid pennies while everyone around me is make the real money.
And then while figuring out what I want to do for a career we have been thinking about babies and when the timing will be right to start out our own family. I don't want to be older when I start a family but I don't want to be so young and poor that I can't really enjoy the time either. Diapers, formula, day care... these are daunting expenses but I know it will all be worth it. But can I balance it all? When do you know that you are ready? Are you ever "ready"?
Since I don't regularly get my period I have been charting my tempature each morning to see if I can track when I ovulate and to see if there is any kinds of patterns in my crazy menstral cycle. And on an even more complicated level, since I don't get regular periods I don't know if I have missed one or not. So now I am routinely taking pregnancy tests just to be sure. I have kicked most of my bad habits, with the exception of an occasional coffee, and have been taking my vitamins on that chance that if I am pregnant I am not harming my potential child.
It is crazy to believe that I am an adult now. I am married, I am in college, I am saving for a house, and we are seriously talking about babies.
